Choose your battles

19 Apr

Unrestrained aggression is unpleasant and unattractive. Poor decision making skills and limited self awareness are sign-posts of a clear lack of connection with reality. Combine these traits and you’re on the quick path to CB territory. Combine these traits with getting your arse handed to you by someone smaller than you and you’re on the wrong side of a humiliating and physically painful experience that could have been easily avoided.

Example #1

Here we see a loud-mouth, belligerent, comparatively larger girl attempting to intimidate a smaller, much calmer seeming fellow human being. This is a bad situation from the get go for the “blonde” girl. For starters, she’s much bigger than the girl she’s yelling at. Secondly, she’s being overtly aggressive instead of talking sensibly with the person she has an issue with. Thirdly, she starts a fight with someone who is clearly capable of kicking her arse into internet infamy. The “blonde” girl has clearly chosen the wrong battle to fight and suffered immeasurably as a result.

Example #2

In this example we see a fictional sample of a poor choice to escalate a disagreement beyond its real-world value.

Fictional or not, whoever wrote it has clearly had similar experiences. I know I have. Elaine refers to her love interest here as perfect. It’s very clear that she’s happy with who he is and what she knows about him and yet she finds a way to create an argument out of something as miniscule as the use of an exclamation mark. If Elaine’s objective is to enjoy being with this perfect man, it would seem that creating a massive, relationship ending argument over his choice to use, or not use, an exclamation mark in a quick note is somewhat counter-productive. From the outside looking in, Elaine appears to have to fought the wrong battle. Again, this is a fictitious situation but I’ve been involved in arguments like this and I was often left wondering what the intended outcome is. What is there to gain from turning something so insignificant into a bid deal? I suspect it has something to do with the whole emotions thing.

Example #3

Like it or not, guys are generally more physically strong than women. This disparity can understandably lead to a tendency for women to feel intimidated by men but most guys don’t I know don’t enjoy knowing women are afraid of them. In fact, most guys wish women weren’t intimidated or afraid of them because it’s already scary enough to go up and talk to a woman you’re interested in without the added concern of her potentially suspecting you want to rape and kill her. It’s pretty shit to be honest but that’s the inevitable outcome of this discrepancy of physical power between the sexes.

There’s no denying that there are men out there who like knowing that they’re stronger than women but it’s worth keeping mind that most of those men also enjoy knowing they’re stronger than most men as well. They’re just dickheads, really. Still, it is important to recognize this difference in physical strength and be aware of the potential negatives that can create. Our society attempts to work around this difference in physical strength but making it known from a very early age that you never hit a woman. It’s really drilled into us as we grow up and very, very few men are unaware of this social norm by the time their body has become clearly stronger than a woman of the same age.

But, solving one problem sometimes causes another. Enter our video evidence:

Don’t push your luck. The poor boy in this video is just trying to get home on the bus and is clearly being subjected to some pretty awful bullying. It’s difficult to argue a case for the girl who is standing over him and hitting him in the head when the boy is saying “Please stop. I just want to go home”. It doesn’t seem like he did anything wrong. It really looks like she’s just acting like a crazy little bitch who has forgotten the fact that the kid she’s picking on is about twice her size. I’m not in favour of violence as a solution to your problems but there are occasions where you have no other option available. Watching this kid wrap that horrid little monster up in a hold where she could no longer harm him and then release her and ask if she’s ok struck me as strangely gentle and caring.

Yes it’s wrong for a boy to use his physical advantage over a woman for his own wants but it’s just fucking crazy for anyone who is clearly on the wrong side of the physical equation to go starting shit. That old adage “Pick on someone your own size” get’s pretty close but I prefer “Don’t fucking pick on anyone, least of all someone twice your size” is a somewhat better suggestion.

This young lady chose poorly. She thought that kid would just accept her urge to punch him repeatedly in the skull and do not fight back. She thought that having her brother there to protect would be an added advantage. She indulged her urge to emphasize her position in the local food chain and has become an internet sensation for all the wrong reasons.

Example #4

Following on from the previous example is this incident of two teenagers in “conflict”. Again we see a much smaller girl bullying a boy. In this case, the boy suffers a mental handicap and you’d have to acknowledge that the punches she throws are somewhat heavier. See for yourself:

Unlike the previous example, however, this lad just cops the abuse. I admire his restraint but I’m not certain I prefer this ending. The rest of the world was pretty unhappy about this incident, so much so that the female star of the video and her family had to go into hiding once it surfaced.

The young girl in this video chose her battle very poorly. Picking on a handicapped kid because he’s not willing to hit you? Seriously? What the fuck? I don’t like that her family feared for their lives but for every action there will be a reaction. Choosing to participate in this was her contribution to the terror her family went through and I, like anyone else who’s seen this footage, hope she’s learned her lesson.

What I’m getting at here

Conflict can be unavoidable but where the option to avoid it exists, how about choosing that option? Society looks at the people who intentionally create conflicts as misfits. If you’re female, that’s going to get you lumped into the bitch category. If you’re out there starting fights with people that can obliterate you if they choose to, you’re going to be called a crazy bitch. You risk having your whole family humiliated and having to hide away from the world because you haven’t recognized just how lowly the world views bullies. You also risk having shit beaten out of you by someone twice your size that you’ve spent the past few minutes enraging. These are bad choices.

Crazy bitch tip: Don’t start fights. Don’t bully people.

Crazy bitch bonus tip: Everyone has a breaking point. Do not seek it, or you will bare it.

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