Take a breath

10 Oct

I was told a story the other day about a young woman who was dumped (very nicely) by her boyfriend, who is by all accounts, a fine young man who treated her well. The young woman in question pretended to take the break-up well but secretly began playing mind games with her now ex-boyfriend.

This young woman decided to make her ex, who was nice enough to still care about her, think that she had gone missing, and imply that she might have harmed herself, maybe even committed suicide. She even teamed up with her friends, convincing them to tell her ex they hadn’t seen or heard from her in days.

However you look at it, that’s just a shitty thing to do. What really makes it detestable to me is that this young woman and her friends were laughing about how concerned the ex-boyfriend was. They got together and mocked his genuine concern for the welfare of someone he clearly cares about.

See, what’s happened here is that the young woman’s feelings were hurt in the break-up and in the process, she began to blame her ex-boyfriend. She took the experience of being rejected and turned it into a personal attack, which she decided she must retaliate against.

There’s a huge flaw in her reasoning. This guy’s not a bad guy, he’s just accepted that the two of them don’t work as a couple, so he broke things off. That’s the right thing to do in that situation. It’s the only thing you can do if you want to be a decent person.

The young woman from this story has reportedly been lovely her whole life up until this point, so she’s probably not a crazy bitch. It’s a damned shame she’s chosen to act like one.

Hurt feelings are dangerous. Good people get twisted by hurt feelings and do awful things that they end up regretting later on. I’ve done it myself, and I very much regret it all in hindsight.

The point is, hurt feelings are an inevitable part of life and you can choose how to deal with them. You can accept that someone has broken up with you and move on, or you can try to make them think you’re trying to kill yourself. That last option, and anything like it, is going to convince people that you’re a crazy bitch, even if you’re not, so maybe go with the ‘move on’ approach when you can.

Crazy bitch tip: don’t blame others for your feelings being hurt.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: