Tag Archives: arse

But… butt… why the arsehole?

9 Sep

I know I’m getting older and I’m losing touch with what’s cool and what’s not, but…

Asshole tattooSeriously?

If someone come to me and said, “hey I want to make hundreds of tiny painful incisions in your poo chute and leave ink in those holes so that there’ll be a permanent design there”, the only chance they have of getting me to agree to it is by following that up with, “and I’m going to pay you $1,000,000 if you let me do it.” And even then I’m not sure I’d go for it. If I did, I would do so begrudgingly and be keeping it very, very quiet.

So it makes it difficult for me to understand that the girl in that picture went to that tattooist and told him, she’d pay him to do that to her. I actually feel bad for the tattooist because that’s gotta be one of the shittiest jobs he’s ever had to undertake.

And you’ve gotta wonder why anyone would want a tattoo on their clacker. Even if you’re an exhibitionist, it’s not exactly an easy location to see. Frankly, the whole thing is outside of the realm of logic for me, and I’m sure I’m not alone in thinking it’s just a bit too out there to be anything less than cookoo mcgoos.

Hey, at least it’s unique

Y’know, it’s amazing how far people will go to be unique. The Guiness Book of World Records is testament to that. Maybe the woman in the picture above thought she was going to be unique because of her tattooed brown eye. Maybe that was part of why she decided to get it done.

I hope not, because…

and also…

So…

It’s your body, you own it. You can do whatever you want with it. It’s just that some things might seem like a good idea at the time but turn out to be horrible choices down the line. Think about it. As weird as it would be going through the process of getting a tattoo on your rectum, at least tatooists are generally used to weird shit, but if (when) you change your mind and decide to get it removed, you’re going to have to explain to someone that you thought getting an anus tattoo was a great idea back in the day but you’ve changed your mind now and you’d really like lasers shot directly at your bunghole to get rid of it.

It’s your right to make bad choices and trust me, I’ve made a fuckload of them myself, but I’ve never gotten a goddamned butthole tattoo because everyone knows that’s a fucking crazy thing to do.

Crazy bitch tip: You really, really, really, really realllllllllllllllllllly don’t need a tattoo on your arsehole.

Do not lick cream out of someone’s buttcrack for tickets to a festival

21 Dec

A Chilean woman was so desperate for tickets to a festival called Maryland¬† that she LICKED CREAM OUT OF A RADIO DJ’S BUTT to ‘win’ them.

Tastes like eternal shame

Tastes like eternal shame

I don’t think I need to go into a lot of detail on this one. Suffice it to say, you shouldn’t do this.

Crazy bitch tip: Don’t lick cream out of people’s butts for tickets to festivals.

Image

But… butt

29 Oct

I know fashion is subjective. I know people can wear what they want. I also know that a lot of people read into who you are based on what you wear. So wearing something like this might not give off the impression you want to convey…

Belted

 

Are they meant to be shorts? Did she forgot her pants and only remember her belt? Are they hot pants that got so hot they caught fire? I have no answers for you. All I can tell you is that a lot of people would see this scenario and walk on by thinking they’ve just seen a crazy bitch.

Crazy bitch tip: It’s generally considered a bad idea to wear clothes that illicit the question: “what the fuck is that?”. I know fashion is subjective. I know people can wear what they want. I also know that a lot of people read into who you are based on what you wear.

Credit: I’m not sure if he took this photo, but the user hitlershomie posted it to Reddit, so we give him the credit for this vision reaching your eyeballs.

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