Tag Archives: humiliation

Origins #24

25 May

At the end of the last post I was lamenting the fact that I’d sent Rene an email after getting a bit sentimental at my final ever Powderfinger show. I had a proper self-cringe going imagining just how lame and embarrassing that email must have been.

Well, I got a little curious if I still had access to that email and it turns out I found it! Here’s what I actually sent:

I think I’ve finally gotten to my point:  I want to know who you are without all the walls. I’m not in a rush. I’m not expecting anything. I’m not looking ahead. I’m looking at some free time I have on Sunday and thinking I’d enjoy that time more if I spent it with you, regardless of what we call that.

You don’t need to reply. I don’t expect you to change your mind and I’ll leave it be from here on out. I just had to say this. Don’t even know why.

Yep, still cringe worthy but not nearly as ridiculous as I would have thought.

notentirelyunpleasant.gif

Considering the mental state I was in at that point in time, I almost give myself a pass. I wouldn’t have normally sent anything, but I wouldn’t normally have been in that situation to begin with.

I think most people would be stressed out enough with what happened with Rene, let alone with all the other shit I was already dealing with. Anyway, on with the story.

A new day cometh

I woke up the next morning and immediately knew it had been a bad decision to send that email. I also knew it was a fat lot of good coming to that conclusion after having sent it.

I avoided checking my emails for the majority of the day but I knew I’d eventually have to face the fallout, and finally checked my emails. There was a reply from Rene.

Fuck.

I didn’t want her to reply. I just wanted to tell her where my head was at. I was worried about making any missteps because I was worried about getting fired as a result, and I was  concerned that this might have been that misstep.

gulp.gif

Scared or not, I had to read her response. It read:

Of course I have to reply, and thank you for what you said.

The truth is I haven’t changed my mind. I know you’re not thinking beyond the present and have no expectations etc, but it’s never as simple as that – and I know myself too. That sounds so ambiguous and probably like a cop out, but it’s true and please just understand that.

I hope things are still cool.

I guess you can read things different ways depending on your state of mind but to me that was a fairly assertive, “It’s not gonna happen. Don’t bring this up again.

nonono

But what was that “ambiguous cop out” bit about? That thing about “I know myself” was  a head-scratcher too. It struck me that Rene was very clearly avoiding explaining anything and just wanted me to leave it alone.

At that time I was equally interested in understanding why Rene had made such a quick about-face as I was in trying to get her to spend time with me and I had lost out on both of points with that response. What she had said only brought up more questions and further emphasized that, whatever the cause, we weren’t going to be getting together to discuss that, or anything else anytime soon.

Yeah umm, sorry.

Given what I perceived as a pretty sturdy and undeniable “Back off”, and the fact that I had been worried about losing my job before any of that chaos with Rene even started, I decided to retreat and try to figure everything out without Rene’s help.

When I say retreat, I mean it. I had already gone into almost complete submission mode when Rene had gotten all freaked out about our upcoming date and I intended to be as delicate as I could possibly be from here on out to make sure my job wasn’t further threatened.

runnn

I have to explain something. I’m not good at bowing to people. I’m not a tip-toeing sort of person. It goes against my nature. I’m direct. I deal with things head on wherever possible. I find it more uncomfortable to dance around an issue than to just tackle it head on. But what choice did I have?

I responded in the least confrontational way I could think of.

Yeah umm, sorry.
Everything’s cool. I Just had a common sense failure after powderfinger got me feeling all sentimental.
Hopefully you can forget that happened or at least put it down to the absinthe I’d been drinking.

Stiff upper lip and all that

I had gone out on a limb at Rene’s request. I had been vulnerable at her request. She had  rejected me after demanding I ask her out. She had provided little in the way of explanation. What little explanation there was had proved more confusing than no explanation at all. Plus, I was sworn to secrecy so I could only speak about it with Rene. Except she didn’t want to talk about it all, which meant I couldn’t talk about it with anyone.

Still, I was more worried about what was going on in Rene’s head than my own. She’d mentioned dealing with an extremely difficult situation that had left her “nothing left to give”. I wanted to help but it was very clear that I wasn’t welcome in any of whatever was going on on her side.

As for me, it’s funny, I’d had a crush on Rene before all this had happened, but I didn’t think about her unless we were in the same place at the same time. I hadn’t intended to try and make anything happen with her, yet suddenly, there I was doing things I wouldn’t normally do. Those emails were a prime example. I didn’t understand what was happening on her side, or mine.

I felt embarrassed, exposed, rejected, humiliated and a host of other feelings that I didn’t even recognize, and the only person I was allowed to speak with about the situation was  clearly unwilling to do so.

I was out of options. All I could do was try to process it alone. I told myself that if I could hold out for a while, Rene would calm down and we’d talk it out then.

determinedornot

…”Hang in there baby” You said it kitty. “Copyright 1968?” Hmm, determined or not, that cat must be long dead. That’s kind of a  downer…

 

I knew that would be exceedingly difficult but that was what I was facing, so I resigned myself to fate. Stiff upper lip and all that.

faceTheStorm.gif

 

Next time

I’ll tell you about when the levy broke.

Parenting: you’re doing it wrong;

2 Mar

I don’t have kids, so it’s fair to say I’m not the best person to go around judging anyone for how they parent their children. Then again, there are some parents out there who do such an impressively bad job of it that it’s tough not to think they should probably know better.

For instance, a Florida woman sent her daughter to school wearing this home made shirt:

the shame shirtIn case you can’t read it, it says:

My name is [blanked out]
I Currently Have All F’s
IN ALL OF My Classes. I AM
NOt aloud to have A boyfriend
No tiMe Soon. So back OFF before
I get another good WOOPIN like
I got last Night. Also I can NO
longer have ANY Friends until
All OF My F’s Are All Brought
Up to C’s And UP!!!

I was going to do that [sic] thing to point out that I’m knowingly reproducing grammatical errors, but if I put one of those in at every error, the quote would have gone on for miles, [sic] to the whole damned thing, ok?

In addition to this mother’s efforts to publicly shame her child by forcing her to wear this shirt, the woman was not kidding about the ‘Woopin’ she mentioned, and her daughter was covered in black and blue marks.

According to Hernando County Sheriff’s Department spokeswoman Denise Moloney, “She beat the child with a belt, and the belt had some sort of metal on it.”

Like I said, I’m not a parent, but… I reckon there are a few key aspects of being a parent that even I can point out as good and/or bad approaches.

For example, one responsibility as a parent is to protect your child. This woman from Florida seems to get the gist of this concept but is failing in the execution of it. See, I think it’s pretty obvious that the mother’s rationale is that by beating the crap out of her daughter and sending her to school in an humiliating shirt, she’s protecting the young girl from bad influences and trying to help her focus on her schooling.

The problem is, the mother has actually caused more harm to her daughter in the process of trying to protect her, than ever would have occurred if the girl failed out of school completely. Being beaten by one of the two people in the world you expect to protect you from beatings is a pretty rough thing to go through. The beating itself is painful, but it’s the memories of your protector causing you to suffer so badly that really lingers.

The public shaming aspect is off the mark too. Sure, this mother wanted to bring home the point that her daughter hasn’t been doing the best she can. Clearly it was important to the mother that her child take on board that schooling is important and that  failing out of all her classes is unacceptable, but, publicly humiliating a child at school is not a good way to encourage her to want to go to school.

So, those are the thoughts of someone who doesn’t have kids, but what do I know?

Well, I do know that the local sheriffs office has arrested the mother for child abuse, so I guess my whole “don’t beat and humiliate your children” thing is somewhat in line with the way they think. Here’s the mugshot of the woman alleged of these actions.author of shirt

Crazy bitch tip: do not beat and humiliate your children, even if they’re not doing as well at school as you’d like.

Don’t go nuts about nuts

9 Feb

The 40 year old daughter of the chairman of Korean Airlines has gone through quite the fall from grace after throwing a massive tantrum on a plane when a steward dared to serve her macadamia nuts in a bag, rather than on a plate. The videos below explain in a bit more detail.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The moral of this story is, you may believe that having a powerful father exempts you from treating your fellow humans with respect, but you will eventually go too far and receive your comeuppance. If you come from a wealthy, powerful family, don’t go around acting like a crazy bitch. Instead, be thankful for the ridiculously fortunate position you happened to be born into.

The fact that this woman is 40 only makes it worse. It would still be unacceptable if these ridiculous actions had been carried out by a teenager, but at least being young and immature might cover some of the farcical nature of the events. It’s embarrassing for everyone involved when you see a grown woman throw a tantrum.

Crazy bitch tip: Do not crack the shits if someone serves your macadamia nuts in a bag instead of on a plate.

Princess Rene

9 Sep

The word Princess

What do you think of when you think of a princess? Class? Elegance? Grace?

princess_grace

Princess Grace, of Monaco. Doing the being a princess thing right.

I guess Princess Grace is a bit old fashioned compared to our modern world. Times have changed, after all. I mean, here’s Princess Mary. A totally different story, right?

Princess Mary, of Denmark. Also doing the being a princess thing right.

Princess Mary, of Denmark. Also doing the being a princess thing right.

Oh. She’s actually classy, graceful, elegant and demure also. Hrmm. It appears there are certain traits that will always be associated with those ladies bestowed with the title ‘Princess’.

Strangely, I notice that one of those traits is not screaming at men to punch themselves in the balls.

“Pardon?”, I hear you ask.

I’ve noticed that women who give themselves the title of ‘Princess’ tend to not really possess the honorable and admirable traits mentioned above. In general, I’d have to say that most women who decide for themselves that they’re a princess, are usually, kinda classless, horrible, crazy bitches. I’m not saying that if you called yourself a princess when you were a little girl that you were an awful little monster. Of course not! You were a kid playing kid games and using your imagination to pretend you were someone wonderful and glamorous! What I’m talking about are fully grown women who go around calling themselves a princess when they’re not.

Princess Rene

So I did a little research and found a prime example of crazy bitch who calls herself a princess. Allow me to introduce you all to ‘Princess’ Rene.

'Princess' Rene. Kind of the opposite of a real princess.

‘Princess’ Rene. Kind of the opposite of a real princess.

Clearly, princess Rene has all the outward components of an attractive woman. Unfortunately, I suspect our dear Rene here is verging on mentally ill, and I say that because I have seen a video of her ‘at work’. I’m going to post the video below but let me first say that this video is targeting an adult demographic and it’s going to get weird. I’m telling you this ahead of time because getting caught watching this video is going to be tough to explain to your boss, or your mum, or, well, anyone. Anyway, take it away Rene…

Let’s just take a minute and consider that, huh?

“My lips are natural and gorgeous and lips that women pay thousands of dollars to achieve.” – princess Rene

“That’s right loser. You’re going to feel some pain for me.” – princess Rene

“In order to get your first kiss from me, I want you to take your hand and make a fist AND PUNCH YOURSELF IN THE FUCKING BALLS” – princess Rene

“Is this fun for you? Cos it’s fun for me!” – princess Rene

“Look at you. You would do anything for me wouldn’t you, you fucking bitch” – princess Rene

“You would do anything for meeeeee. And why wouldn’t you? I’m fucking perfect. I’m amazing. I’m gorgeousssss.” – princess Rene

“I want you to do one last ball-punch” – princess Rene

The charming princess Rene.

The charming princess Rene.

I’m not going to pretend there aren’t guys out there that are attracted to ‘bitchy’ girls like this but I can tell you that I’m not one of those guys. I can also tell you that any guy that is attracted to women like this has some issues that might be worth dealing with. Seeing that we’re on How Not To Be A Crazy Bitch though, I’m going to focus more on the pink-lingerie clad, little nut-bar we’ve just watched scream into a video camera of some sort for few minutes with the intention of getting men to punch themselves in the balls over her.

More than meets the eye

What strikes me as interesting about Rene is that she is playing out the natural extension of a certain type of woman, that type being the attractive but very insecure girl. If you spoke with Rene (or whatever her real name is) about this video, she’d tell you she’s just playing a role, just pretending, that she’s only doing this silly stuff because it’s a way to make easy money. But I’d call bullshit on that, because someone as physically attractive as Rene here, could be making money hand over fist in a bunch of different ways because, let’s face it, men are pretty quick to hand over money when a good looking woman is around.

Nope. Rene here is absolutely into what she’s doing. She’s getting her jollies knowing that she has a power over guys. I’ve run into girls like this. I guarantee you that Rene will treat any man who shows interest in her like he’s a worthless piece of shit but she knows deep down she doesn’t really have any power, and that’s why the guy who ignores her is the one she’s going to chase. Of course, she’ll only chase him until he actually shows that he’s interested in her, at which point she will immediately relegate him to the rank of loser in her head and lose all interest in him.

Girls like Rene spend their whole lives ‘testing’ men by treating them like absolute shit, and the only guys they’re interested in are the guys who don’t give a shit about them because those guys don’t react to her bullshit. It’s ironic because girls like Rene end up throwing themselves at the guys who don’t care about them specifically because those guys don’t care about them, and then they complain about the fact that those guys don’t care about them. Then, to make themselves feel better, they abuse their power over other men in order to return the pain and suffering they felt at being rejected or ignored.

Don’t be like Rene

Think about it like this: If Rene here were really as confident and happy as she would like us to believe, would she really be stuck filming herself on a computer in a random, empty bedroom? Wouldn’t she at least have a cameraman?

Everything about Rene’s behaviour in the video screams to me that she’s a spoiled little kid who never matured into adulthood. She’s fueled by her joy of abusing the natural power her physique gives her and comes across to me as a vapid, self-centred, sadistic, angry little sociopath who is very confused about her position within the world. Do you think Rene sits back at the end of a long day filming “punch yourself in the balls” videos and thinks to herself, “I’m really living a fulfilling life of pure joy and satisfaction”? I doubt it.

Look, if you won the genetic lottery and as the result you’re an attractive young woman, please don’t waste your time playing stupid, pointless, hurtful power-games. You won’t get what you really want out of it, all you’ll do is cause yourself and a bunch of other people a shitload of unnecessary suffering. Look at what the truly happy people in the world do… they treat each other with respect and consideration and they certainly don’t intentionally inflict suffering or test each other for vulnerabilities.

I’m in my mid thirties now and I’ve seen a lot of the girls that were really good looking when we were growing up somehow fuck themselves out of finding deep and meaningful relationships with good, genuine men because they couldn’t get past this immature urge to play power games. Don’t make that mistake because I’ve seen those same girls start throwing themselves at anything that even remotely resembles a man when their biological clocks start ticking and the crows feet start settling in, and it ain’t pretty.

Crazy bitch tip: Give the power games a break and try actually doing things that lead to happiness instead.

 

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