Tag Archives: inappropriate

Charity

31 Aug

Being charitable is a good thing, no matter what form you choose for your charitable efforts to take. It is however also true that in some instances, the suggested method of charity might raise more than a few eyebrows.

Some people mistakenly think that their charitable efforts should somehow relate to their vocation. For example, a bricklayer might think that the best way to offer assistance would be the offer of laying bricks. That’s an example in which the vocation might be a worthwhile contribution to the cause at hand. Other vocations like ‘blogger’, ‘movie critic’ or ‘bikini waxer’ might not be so beneficial. Let’s face it, if you’ve just experienced a tornado, hurricane, a flood, or some other monumental tragedy, you’re probably not going to get a lot out of a free opinion on the documentary being made about said tragedy.

That’s why, the more typical approach to being charitable in these situations is to donate some money to a reputable charity who will be assisting in helping those affected by the unfortunate circumstances. Part of the rationale behind that is that money is much more universally useful. Another reason, is that some pretty crazy offers come through in the name of charity…

I’m sure that most people immediately assume that all female porn stars are crazy bitches but I’m not one of them. I don’t think you can generalise like that. I do, however, believe that suggesting that you might offer some benefit to a bereaved man who’s daughter has passed away by dressing up as a schoolgirl and offering him your body for his own amusement, does make it difficult to argue against you being a crazy bitch.

I also concede that offering your asshole as a storage space to people going through a tragedy and combining that sentiment with ‘bless you’ is unarguably straight out of crazy bitchdom.

Crazy bitch tip: When it comes to charity, generally it’s not a great idea to offer sexual acts.

 

Family guy examples

20 Jul

Asking out a 24 year old girl

This seems so exaggerated that it couldn’t possibly be real, right? False. It might be exaggerated but this is exactly what it’s like when you’re a guy trying to ask out a girl like this. I don’t know about other guys but for me, when I was asking a girl out, it wasn’t meant to be a game or deception or anything confusing, I was just asking her if she wanted to spend some time with me. This seemed to be completely lost on some girls though.

If a guy asks you out and you want to go out with him, say “Yes”. If a guy asks you out and you don’t want to go out with him, say “No thanks”. If you’re not sure if you want to go out with the guy, say “Yes” and figure it out by the end of the date.

There’s no reason to turn it into some big confusing pile of horseshit, and here’s some inside info from the guy’s side it pisses us off, confuses us and if you do a bad enough job, it can really hurt our feelings. There’s nothing more humiliating than finding out the girl you though was keen on you was just playing with you for some attention and there’s nothing more frustrating than finding out that the girl you really liked wanted to go out with you but was “playing hard to get”.

Pleas understand this. Men cannot read your mind. You might be playing hard to get while every other girl that guy has asked out was just not interested, how the hell is he supposed to know that when you say “No”, you actually meant “Please ask me again later to confirm for me that you’re really, really interested because I like playing weird little games with people instead of just saying what I actually mean.”?

Men: We don’t know what we did

And that brings me to the fact that us mere males have pretty much no idea what the hell you women are after most of the time.

This is an interesting little bit of animation here because when most guys watch this, they laugh at how crazy the girl is but when most girls watch it, they understand why the girl is upset. In case you didn’t get it, watch it again but keep this in mind… the girl is interested in the guy and she’s hoping that he’ll ask her to walk with him to the next class they both have together, the guy is of course, completely unaware of this and his non-nonchalant “Seeya there” is seen by the girl as a rejection and thus, humiliated, she runs away. Her friend is then furious at Mr Oblivious for hurting the young lady’s feelings.

I’ve been through this one too. Actually, I’ve been through this one a LOT. Let me point out yet again that men have no mind reading super powers, no matter how much you might wish we did. When girls act like this, they expect guys to be paying attention to all their little cues and hints and body language and whatever else but you forget that we might not necessarily be in detective mode every waking second of every day.

There’s a massive crossover between the behaviour of a girl who is legitimately attracted to a guy and a girl who is just being friendly. There are also girls out there who just love to flirt with guys they aren’t interested in, and that looks pretty much identical to when a girl is interested. Guess the wrong way and make a move and the guy can be mockingly rejected, guess the wrong way (or don’t even notice) and the guy runs the risk of massively offending the girl. It’s a minefield.

Interestingly, most women tend to stop playing the confusing games and being indirect as they get older, especially so if they’ve never married.

Going on a blind date with a 37 year old

I don’t have direct experience with dating a 37 year old. I have, however dated some ladies in their early 30s and even some in their mid-to-late 20s who have acted in a slightly less cartoony version of what’s shown in the animation above. The increasingly loud biological clock and other societal pressures tend to mount against women as they get older if they’re still single and childless.

When women let this pressure get to them, a lady’s standards can drop through the floor. Once desperation creeps in, things get pretty full on. To tell you the truth, ladies, it can be flat-out terrifying. As a guy, it can end up feeling like her sole interest in you is for your baby batter and as soon as she’s certain you’re not firing blanks, her focus turns to limiting your opportunities for escape. I’m reminded of episode #12…

and episode #13

What the hell is my point?

We don’t know what you want. We know we want you to have it (unless it means you’re just trying to lock us into a quickfix marriage to beat your biological clock) and we know we don’t want to upset you if we can avoid it, so maybe it’s worth noting that WE CAN’T READ YOUR MINDS. 99% of the problems I’ve run into with girlfriends and potential girlfriends has come down to one simple thing, a lack of clear communication from the woman involved and it drives me round the bend. Why the hell did we put all this time and effort into creating all these different languages with all these beautiful words if you’re still going to try and communicate with your eyelashes and various other silent and generally invisible ‘hints’?

If you ladies are gonna make fun of guys for acting like cave men and being big dumb animals, don’t go getting all shitty at us when we do a piss-poor job of playing super-duper girl move detectives. WE DON’T KNOW THAT LANGUAGE AND THE MOVES MEAN DIFFERENT THINGS DEPENDING ON WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO. So please, stop it.

Crazy bitch tip: if any of the women in these videos remind you of your self, it’s time to do some self reflection and consider if that behaviour is actually helping you towards getting what you want.

Video

Episode #20 – Cut off

3 Jul

YOLO. No, No.

13 Apr

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term YOLO, it is an abbreviation of You Only Live Once. YOLO became popular as a result of a song called “The Motto”, released in 2011 by Canadian rapper, Drake.

YOLO quickly became the war-cry of young people everywhere as they embarked upon risky, poorly thought-out endeavors.

For instance:

A bad decision (Photograph of young lady with the word DRAKE tattood across her forehead.

YOLO is not a particularly new concept. A similar phrase with a similar meaning has been around for many centuries. To behave as if every day might be your last is potentially very beneficial, but it can also have its drawbacks:

YOLO. Oh No! Jack Black is not known for his wisdom but in this case, it appears he was onto something when he pointed this out:

YOLO is Carpe Diem for stupid people.Evidence in his favour was clear as the trend caught on and people became more and more willing to ignore common sense completely and instead make obviously bad decisions. If you’re going to make a bad decision, it’s far better to make one that will only have a short-term impact. YOLO, however inspired the sorts of bad decisions which will last a very, very long time.

yolo tattoo yolo tattoo yolo tattoo yolo tattoo yolo tattoo yolo tattoo

So how does this jibber-jabber about YOLO relate to avoiding the crazy-bitch monicker? I think it’s fairly clear already but I might as well state the obvious. Impulsiveness is a massive indicator that you’re a crazy bitch. If you’re out for the night with a guy you like and you end up in the following situation, it’s quite likely that guy you like is going to see you as too crazy for his liking.

Bitches be like YOLO

It’s just not what most guys are after. Actually, if the guy is after that, you’d better stay the hell away from him.

Crazy bitch tip: You do only live once, so take some chances in life and push yourself beyond your comfort zone, but don’t get shitty tattoos you’ll regret for the rest of your life.

Crazy bitch bonus tip: Avoid acting anything like this…

 

The difference between appropriate and inappropriate

25 Mar

Most of us learn that the way we behave should be influenced by the company we’re with and the setting we’re in. For example, speedos magically become undies if you’re not near the water, as the following scientific ice-cream commercial demonstrates.

 

As we grow up we pick up on these social norms and we adapt ourselves to fit. Most of us don’t talk on our phones while we’re at the movies. Most of us don’t speak the same way with our boss that we do when we’re with our friends, and most of us don’t drive at twice the speed limit and swear at the dealership representative while we’re taking a car out for a test drive.

Most of us…

 

In case you were wondering, haole is an Hawaiian word that literally translates to foreigner but is also used as a racial slur. The passenger in the video seemed to be expecting it, don’t you think? This additional information indicates that we’ve just seen a woman being completely inappropriate in both action and words, and she’s thrown in a bit of light racism to leave us no other option but to consider her an absolutely mental, max-level, super-duper crazy bitch.

We’re not here to hate, though, are we? We’re here to educate and provide assistance to those people who would like to avoid being painted with the same brush as women of this ilk. The biggest mistake the woman in the video made was to let her crazy out in the wrong circumstances with the wrong person. Those close to her might have been willing to look past her double-the-limit speed and overtly aggressive and racist screaming. Maybe, but she didn’t consider how her inappropriate behaviour might come back to bite her.

Crazy bitch tip: If you realise you’re doing something inappropriate, either stop yourself or acknowledge that you’re willingly choosing to accept the potential of a video of you acting like a complete and utter bitch-faced monster going viral. You have a choice to make.

If the speeding, shrieking, swear-goblin video wasn’t enough to convince you, witness the infamous glory of these two oxygen stealing CBs:

 

crazy bitch tip: the nicest outfit and hat can’t make you classy if you’re acting like a drunken ape.

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