Tag Archives: lie
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“I wouldn’t have to lie if you trusted me”

19 May

Rachel Dolezal

16 Jul

Rachel Dolezal is a weirdo. That’s not a nice thing to say, but it’s unfortunately quite accurate.

WTF?

If you’re not familiar with the story, the short version is that Rachel Dolezal had been claiming to be black traded on that fact to help her get into the position of head of the Spokane chapter of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People. That organisation, also known as the NAACP, fights for the rights of people of colour within America, and Ms Dolezal effectively used a modern take on blackface to get a high profile job within the organisation.

How do we know for sure that Ms Dolezal is not black? Her parents told us. Ms Dolezal was born two, ordinary, everyday Caucasian parents of German and Czech origins. There is no denying that Ms Dolezal is as Caucasian as can be.

There’s no denying it

Photos have also given us a pretty solid indication that she miiiiiiiiggggghhhhhtttttt just be white under all that tan and hair trickery. For instance, here’s Rachel Dolezal’s wedding photo:

Rachel Dolezal's wedding photo suggests she is not of African heritage.

Rachel Dolezal’s wedding photo suggests she is not of African heritage.

Ms Dolezal has had a lot of interaction with people of colour throughout her life. For example, her parents adopted some children who happened to be non-Caucasian. She thought of those children as her siblings, but they certainly did not ever think she was black.

According to her siblings, she did not think she was black until 2011

Here’s an example of her adopted brother’s opinion on her behaviour.

And another:

But she was a human rights activist, that’s good no matter how she got there, right?

Bullshit.

Rachel Dolezal’s behaviour is making a mockery of her position of the head of the NAACP chapter in Spokane by bringing ‘being black’ into question. If Ms Dolezal wanted to help people of colour get a better and more equal go of things she could done that just as well without lying about her race.

And now she’s come out with all this rubbish about believing she’s ‘transracial’ and she’s damaging the credibility of both transgender people anyone who might actually have a legit claim to being transracial. There are people out there, for example, who are considered ‘not black enough’ to be black by members of their own race, and that to me would trigger some serious difficulties which could potentially be labeled ‘transracial’ but just being endeared towards another culture does NOT measure up, and claiming that it does is a selfish and manipulative effort for Ms Dolezal to attempt to escape the scrutiny she’s under.

But she’s had the black experience!?

Fuck off with that rubbish.

Ms Dolezal claims to understand the black experience and have a deep, personal connection with being black, except she grew up white in a very white community and has only recently started to modify her appearance to look black. Even if Ms Dolezal has experienced a bit of racism directed towards her, if it all gets too much for her, she could just switch back to looking like a white person. That’s the difference right there, hers is a choice, a decision, a type of tourism.

Montel Williams is spot on here:

A person who is of African heritage cannot just switch out when they feel like the inherent racism they have to deal with is restricting their opportunities in life. They’re stuck with that and have to accept that the system is pretty shit, and that they’ll have to fight to be afforded the same treatment provided to Caucasians… and that’s exactly WHY THE NAACP EXISTS, and then an impersonator gets into the top job of the local chapter and even fucks up the efforts of black people to fight for their rights!

Can’t say I agree with Whoopi on that one. I think Rosie Perez is right on the money.

She’s a liar

Rachel Dolezal was caught out and she’s trying to lie her way out of it. The saddest part is there’s a lot of speculation that it was her divorce that pushed her into some sort of nervous breakdown, at which point she attempted to deal with it by changing who she believed she was.

I’m not judging the woman for having a tough time and that impacting her in a difficult way, but that doesn’t absolve her of the bullshit she’s been spouting since she was caught out.

Transracial issues may be valid or not, but Rachel Dolezal is not a good example. She’s a liar and is only concerned with getting away with being caught out and she’s mangling a whole bunch of bullshit lies together in order to get out of it.

Crazy bitch tip: Stop fucking lying about your reasons for dressing up in black face.

Origins #15

19 Jun

Picking up where I left off, I was figuring out the best way to ask out my boss’s daughter after she’d spent the night at my place. Look, to be completely honest, I can’t remember if I asked Rene out on the Sunday evening or waited ’til Monday. I think it was Sunday but gimme a break ok, it was nearly 5 years ago.

Actually, part of the reason I’m trying to write this all down is so I’ve got a half accurate version of the events that took place before I forget them all. The tough part is that it was a downright awful experience to go through, so it’s not exactly fun trying to remember it in fine detail. Anyway…

Time to ask Rene out

Unlike her sister Laura, Rene didn’t work at Everlong, so I wouldn’t be seeing her in person anytime soon. I guess I could have called her, but we’d never called each other before and after the somewhat dramatic turn of events the weekend had become, I wasn’t inclined to fall into a super awkward conversation on the phone. I instead went the SMS route. I spent a bit of time thinking about what to write, but in the end I just said exactly what I was thinking. It was something like:

Hey, wanna catch up sometime this week? Friday got a bit full on, so I reckon we find something nice and chill to do and just hang out.

Then came the always fun waiting for the response phase of the sms communication medium. I have at times stressed out like crazy while waiting for a response to a message like that, but I don’t think I was that stressed about this one. I figured that after Rene literally demanded that I ask her out, the odds were in my favour. Even if she said no, that would be a way out of a hugely complex situation anyway, so it was kinda win, win.

The response is in

Pretty quickly after sending my message to Rene, my phone uttered that classic Nokia sms received tone. Rene’s response was in: Yes. Sounds good. How about Wednesday night? Hey, hey! That was what I wanted to hear. Straight forward. Easy. No fuss. No confusion. Fantastic! And there I was fretting about it being a big deal and making what was already an extremely complicated time in my life even more complicated. Phew! excellent I can’t claim that is 100% exactly what Rene sent, but I remember very clearly that she used the word “Yes” and not “yeah” or “ok”, but specifically the word “yes”. It’s a weird detail to remember but it stuck with me because it seemed kind of formal. Not that it bothered me. Quite the opposite, actually. “Yes” seemed like the best possible answer.

Like I said before, it was a pretty huge thing for me to admit to Rene that I liked her and it had put me in a really weird situation, so it really was a big relief to get that message back and to know that we were still on the same page. I figured we’d just let things play out and see what happens.

Monday always comes around to spoil the weekend

Monday shows up too early as always and this one was particularly unwanted because it meant facing whatever assumptions my colleagues had made about the fact that I left the restaurant with Rene. And assume they did. I always got into work nice and early, about 7:30, so I could get out early to get to the shops and whatever, so I was at my desk before anyone else arrived for the day.

One by one they came in, each with the same insinuations about me having to worry about my job because I obviously had sex with the boss’s daughter and her dad would find out and fire me. Each time I had to explain that nothing untoward had happened, that Rene had fallen asleep on my couch and that was the full extent of the evening’s adventures. innocent Yeah, I was lying, but I was lying specifically because I’d been asked to by Rene. I don’t like lying. I don’t like secrets. I don’t like whispering. I don’t like gossip. I certainly don’t like having to intentionally mislead people I work with all day, every day, who I considered friends, but I’d been asked to, so I lied.

The news spread quickly that Rene had stayed over at my place and I started getting emails from the girls at the other office. I spent more time trying to politely disregard inquiries about my supposed sexual escapades with my boss’s daughter than working that morning. I was already stressed out with everything else. The last thing I wanted was to be the focal point of all that gossip. It’s not like I had any choice, though. After Mike had seen us walking back to Rene’s car there was little choice but to come up with an explanation and stick to it.

Rene’s parents were overseas

Someone had told me on Friday night that Tim Everlong and his wife were away for two weeks. That knowledge at least was one minor positive in what I was expecting to be an increasingly complex situation. If nothing else, at least I’d have a bit of time to let everything settle before they’d be back and asking questions. Or so I thought. wrong Rene’s parents may well have been away for two weeks but not long after lunch, as a complete surprise to me, Rene’s father Time Everlong comes strolling into the open plan office in which I worked. I’m sure I’ve mentioned before that Tim was a very friendly bloke who would roam around chatting with us all and making jokes and generally being the sort of company owner that you dream of having. This unexpected visit was no exception, except that this time I was crapping my dacks expecting him to fire me any second, but he spent so much time joking around with everyone that I started to relax a bit.

Did everyone have a good Friday night?

The fact that he hadn’t spoken to me directly was a bit of a cause for concern but I started to assume he hadn’t heard anything and that it’d surface another day and I’d deal with it then. What a relief! At least that had worked out in my favour for now. After Tim had done his rounds of talking to every single person in that office except me, he headed towards the door not far from my desk. I figured he was about to leave.

Sure he hadn’t spoken to me personally but that was no big deal, totally just a coincidence, and frankly I would have been very uncomfortable trying to talk to him with full knowledge of what I’d gotten up to with his daughter over the weekend while he was none the wiser. But as Tim got the door he didn’t say goodbye, as anticipated. No. Instead, Tim turned and looked at me directly for the first time that visit and said in a very loud voice,

“So, did everyone have a good Friday night?”

The entire room went silent. Every eye in the place was aimed directly at me, including Tim’s, who were locked on mine, which had instantly widened to the size of saucers. I’m not sure how long passed as the owner of the company I worked for, who was under the impression that I’d fucked his little princess’s brains out a few days prior, eyeballed me, but it felt like about a decade or so. Tim eventually turned away and walked out through the open doorway.

SMH

A pregnant pause had consumed the entire place and brought with it an ominous silence.  That silence was broken by the thump of my forehead against my desk. headdesk Milliseconds after the sound of my noggin colliding with my grey, generic office desk had reverberated through that  office, the whole place erupted with laughter so raucous I was surprised the windows didn’t blow out. laughing-at I sat and shook my head while the whole office laughed their arses off at me. I was the unwilling star of a sit-com and my colleagues were providing the laugh track. mj-smh

Next time…

So that was how Monday went, I’ll be back to tell you how the rest of that ridiculous week played out. Trust me, this is only the start of my personal sit-com hell.

Belle Gibson lied about everything

25 Apr Belle Gibson drinking beer from a pint glass

belle gibson drinking from a wine bottleBelle Gibson has been a prominent figure in the alternative health world for some time now. Ms Gibson’s big claim to fame has been that she miraculously cured her terminal brain cancer just by eating healthy food. Not only did she claim that she cured her own cancer, she also suggested that other cancer patients would benefit from following her healthy lifestyle and profited from selling a cook book and app on the subject.

And it was all bullshit.

Wikipedia sums the scenario up nicely:

In early 2015, emerging media scrutiny revealed that Gibson’s cancer claims appeared to have been fabricated, that she had lied about her age and other details of her personal life and history, and had used company and charity campaign funds to lead a profligate and affluent lifestyle. There are claims she rented an expensive town house, leased an office suite and luxury car, underwent cosmetic dental procedures, and holidayed internationally from the proceeds of money purportedly raised for charity.

After a month of intense media scrutiny of her story, in an April 2015 interview Gibson admitted that her cancer claims had been totally fabricated, stating “none of it’s true”.

Gibson’s actions have been described as “deceit on a grand scale, for personal profit”.

It’s estimated that the book and app had raised over $1,000,000 and Gibson herself has claimed that she had “countless times helped others” to treat their cancers “naturally” and “leading them down natural therapy for everything from fertility, depression, bone damage and other types of cancer”.

Do you realise what that means? She lied to cancer patients to profit from their hopelessness and actively lead them away from the only treatments that are medically proven to help them survive.

Belle Gibson drinking beer from a pint glass

And she didn’t even follow the bullshit she was spouting about keeping toxins out of your body

In addition to this, it is alleged that Gibson raised a lot of money in the name of 5 different charities but either didn’t use the money for the charitable work she had claimed she would and/or massively exaggerated how much of the money she did end up going to charity.

Gibson actively encouraged things such as not vaccinating children, consuming raw, non-pasteurised milk, and Gerson Therapy.

When it became clear that people were going to find out that Gibson had never had cancer at all, let alone the multiple cancers she had claimed, she started deleting any posts relating to that topic from her social media platforms. In many cases, she went further and deleted the accounts completely.

Gibson has finally bitten the bullet and conceded that everything that she’d said to help her become famous was fabricated. She had lied her way into the hearts of those millions of people who are suffering with medical conditions that modern medicine doesn’t have pleasant solutions for, and then she used those lies to take their money.

You don’t have to be a shrink to suspect Ms Gibson is an out and out crazy bitch, now do you?

Of course there’s been complete uproar since the truth has come to light. And Ms Gibson’s response is has been to say:

“In the last two years I have worked every single day living and raising up an online community of people who supported each other… I understand the confusion and the suspicion, but I also know that people need to draw a line in the sand where they still treat someone with some level of respect or humility – and I have not been receiving that.”

and

“I just think [speaking out] was the responsible thing to do. Above anything, I would like people to say, ‘Okay, she’s human. She’s obviously had a big life. She’s respectfully come to the table and said what she’s needed to say, and now it’s time for her to grow and heal.’”

Of all the shit Ms Gibson has said and done, to me, it’s these quotes which are the most telling of just how far from normal her line of thinking is. You don’t get to build an empire on lies while you take money from hopeless, suffering people in return for offering them fairytales and good vibes and then get to expect anyone to feel sorry for you or be understanding of your plight.

What the fuck sort of thinking is that? If you actively and knowingly deceive people, you don’t get to be treated with dignity when they find out. No, you should count yourself lucky that some poor cancer patient who wasted time on your lies doesn’t hunt you down and end you! For fuck sake! Who the hell could do this and still expect “some level of respect or humility”? That’s the statement right there that just proves there’s something very, very wrong with Belle Gibson.

There are a lot of angry people out there who are definitely not saying “Okay, she’s human.” Instead, they’re calling her a monster, and I’d be hard pressed to disagree.

So, as far as the crazy bitch ranks go, Belle Gibson is sitting very, very high up. She may even be the craziest bitch I’ve ever heard of.

Crazy bitch tip: do not mislead millions of people into thinking that eating well and exercising are enough to fight cancer.

Origins #11

3 Mar

I was still there in my bed with my boss’s daughter, and I was proud of myself for admitting that I had a crush on her instead of holding that information back and leaving her to cry in the belief that I just wanted to sleep with her. If you’ve read up to here, I’m sure you think it’s a bit weird that she somehow thought I was just trying to sleep with her considering I’d put in a fair bit of effort to avoid having anything happen with her, but hey, I was pretty drunk and that didn’t occur to me at the time.

Oops

Something I have remembered since posting last time was that, at some point after Rene and I had arrived at my place, I’d asked her about her sister Laura’s relationship. I’d pointed out that it seemed like something was off there. Rene told me she didn’t know much about it and seemed a bit down about me asking. Turns out Rene knew more than she was letting on and had taken my curiosity as further evidence of her belief that I was interested in Laura.

In hindsight, I guess that was another reason why Rene was so certain I was into Laura. I was into Laura. I’d say I liked her about as much as I liked Rene, but in a different way. It’s tough to explain because I knew Laura much better than Rene. I’ll tell you right now though, most guys would be falling all over themselves to get anywhere near either of these young women, but up until this particular night I’d done a brilliant job of behaving myself around both of them.

You have to ask me out on a proper date!

Anyways, I’d just finished admitting to Rene that I’d had a crush on her for a long time and she’d lit up with joy at hearing it. It’s not like I confessed to having an undying love for her, either. I’d only told her that I’d liked her for a long time and that I wanted to get to spend some time with her and get to know her better but Rene reacted like all her Christmases had come at once and we kissed some more as a result.

Rene stopped crying again and we went back to kissing and whatnot but we were still talking the whole time, and she started telling me how she’d made all these moves on me and asked why I’d never made any moves back. Rene pointed out that she had added me on Facebook, got my work email and started emailing me, gotten my mobile number from her sister and started texting me and even after all of that, I still hadn’t asked her out.

I told her, “You’re my boss’s daughter.”
“So?”, she asked.
“So I need my job”, I explained.
“But you never even asked me out”, she insisted.
“I’m not going to hit on my boss’s daughter. I invited you out to everything and I just figured that was as much as I could do, but you hardly ever came to anything”, I pointed out.
“But you never asked me out on a proper date, just the two of us!”, Rene said.
“I figured you could tell I was interested. You knew I couldn’t ask you out, I figured you’d ask me out if you wanted to see me.”, I told her.
“I was pretty sure that night you told me my ex in France was an idiot. But you have to ask me out now! You have to ask me out on a proper date!”, she told me, practically bouncing up and down with excitement.
“Alright. I’ll ask you out on a proper date.” I told her.

Rene was grinning ear to ear and kissing me with some serious passion after that, but even as drunk as I was, it all sounded like a weird way to go about it to me. I mean, we were in bed with each other and there she was demanding that I ask her out on a date? It’s not like I would have minded asking her out, but we were well past the ‘asking out’ stage of things.

But I’d been drinking, and she’d been drinking, and the whole thing was a bit of a mess. So I figured, if she wanted me to ask her out, I’d ask her out.

Drunken singing

We were making out and laughing and having all the stupid, drunken fun you tend to have when you’ve been drinking all night with someone you’re interested in. We started talking about all sorts of things, like the music we like and what we loved about the 90s and probably a bunch of other shit that I honestly can’t remember.

I do remember that we laid out in that bed playing songs off our phones and singing along to them between kissing and touching, and more singing, and more kissing, and more singing. At one point, I’m loathe to admit, I grabbed my ukulele from beside my bed and tried to play a tune for us to sing to, but I was too drunk to play, so gave up on that idea pretty quick.

It might sound lame, but of everything that happened that night, singing along to those songs together was my favourite bit. I was digging that we had so much in common. There was something awesome about being in bed with this girl I’d liked for so long and that we’d ended cuddled up, singing along to John Farnham songs, and making out like teenagers.

The Roller Coaster Continues

emor

Unfortunately, it wasn’t too long before Rene started crying again.

“You want something serious, don’t you”, she sobbed.
“What are you talking about?”, I asked her.
“You said you want something serious”, she repeated.
“No I didn’t, I said I want to hang out with you a bit and get to know you”, I explained, confused.
I continued, saying, “I couldn’t even think about getting into something serious anytime soon. I just want to hang out with you under the radar, get to know you properly and see what happens.”

And that was the absolute truth of the matter. I wasn’t looking to go from zero to 100 with her. Shit, I didn’t think I really knew Rene well enough to think anything beyond maybe going on a date with her. I wasn’t thinking about the future, aside from the very risky situation I was going to be in from a work perspective.

Like I said in an earlier post, all I was really looking for was to get to hang out with someone I thought was cool. I thought Rene was cool, so now we could get onto the hanging out with each other part, and eventually I’d get to know her well enough to see if there was something more than a basic attraction.

I lie to people and confuse them until they stop asking questions

Rene calmed down again and stopped crying.

We continued to talk, and I truly cannot remember how we ended up getting to this, but at one point Rene explained to me that she was an exhibitionist.

OK, so I’m with this girl I think is gorgeous and she’s already indicated to me that she likes things a bit rough in bed, and then she tells me she’s an exhibitionist. I was surprised to hear that but I was also very excited. I don’t think I’m a pervert, but I sure  am a very, very sexual person, and one aspect of that is that I like to do things that are a bit risqué. I definitely don’t want the girl I’m with to be skanky by any means, but that doesn’t mean she can’t be a bit naughty and fun, so to hear that this girl who I genuinely liked for other reasons was also a bit naughty was a huge added bonus.

And then Rene told me that she thinks she’s nowhere near as good as her sister Laura, that Laura has her shit together and that she’s doing so well, and Laura’s so pretty, and Laura’s this and that and whatever else. I, of course, tried to point out to Rene that she’s pretty awesome herself and shouldn’t compare herself to Laura, but Rene responded by telling me that she makes mistakes all the time and ruins things.

I don’t really remember exactly what she said, but I know Rene told me that she was still in contact with the guy she’d moved to France to be with, even though he’d cheated on her and she’d moved back to Australia broken hearted, she had kept in contact with him. Not only had she kept in contact with him, she was now playing the role of mistress behind the back of this douchebag’s new girlfriend.

I remember telling her, “Well, stop that shit, then!”

Again, I’m not sure how we got onto this, but Rene ended up telling me that she makes a lot of mistakes and it really upsets her. I don’t remember much of the conversation but I do remember her telling me, “I lie to people and confuse them until they stop asking questions.”

Idiot

Trust me, I know very well that I should have taken these things as red flags. I know I’m an idiot for not doing so at the time, but I was drunk and as far as I knew, I was with a beautiful, intelligent, fun, sexy young woman who happened to be going through a rough time and also happened to be full of red wine and cocktails.

Everybody says stupid shit when they’ve been drinking, so I wasn’t judging her for any of what she said. I guess I did take some of those statements on board though, as I certainly kept an eye out for certain things she’d mentioned about herself in the months to come. You’ll hear all about that soon enough.

But it’s not like Rene was the only one saying or doing stupid shit that night. I was on a roll, myself.

I’d managed to completely miss the fact that Rene was worried that I was interested in Laura and had contributed to making her cry as a result, repeatedly as the night went on.

I’d drunkenly pushed my boss’s daughter up and down some serious hills in a freakin’ shopping trolly, the most dangerous of all vehicles. I’d let the night get out of hand by not staying sober. I’d ended up in bed with my boss’s daughter, for fuck’s sake. I hadn’t stopped it and called her a taxi, I hadn’t told her we shouldn’t do anything, I hadn’t walked out of the room when she flashed me. I’d done a lot of stupid shit that night myself.

But I had one more awesomely stupid thing to say.

I totally understand why I said it, but that doesn’t mean I actually understand why I said it. Oh god. I actually have to tell you what I said. Ahh fuck it!, here goes…

I don’t exactly remember when but at one point in the night when I was in bed with Rene, I half whispered: “I want kids.”

I know.

embarrased

I know it was a moronic thing to do, but if you remember from Origins #7, I’d been talking with Rene’s sister earlier that day about how important it was to let people know what you want out of life before you get involved with them, and I didn’t mean that I wanted kids with Rene, I just meant that, at some point in my future, I’d like to be a parent. And somehow, as a result of all that rational logical, sense-making, I was pretty drunk and it just came out.

I totally get that it was a stupid thing to do, and even as I write this, I feel very much like this…

shm1Oh lord the shame I feel for admitting that I said that. Let’s never speak of it again. Ahhh shame my old friend, what would life be without you?

You want to know the worst part? I’m pretty sure I said that after Rene had her little freak-out about me wanting something serious. I just don’t know what I was thinking. I do think my little revelation was on the mild side in comparison to admitting to being an exhibitionist, or intentionally confusing people until they give up asking question, or playing the mistress, etc, etc but it was still a really embarrassing thing for me when I was forced to think back on it later.

Nearly there

As it turns out, there’s still a little bit more of that night that I have to tell you about, including more confusion, weird encouragement and weird rejection. Catch ya then!Crazy bitch tip: If you move to another country to be with a guy and he then cheats on you, don’t talk to him anymore because he’s clearly a massive douche.

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